(no subject)

[everlongmoon]

Character: Cloud Strife, Rinoa Heartilly
Fandom: Final Fantasy
Searching for...: Zack Fair and Cloud Strife'.
Plot Ideas or Reasons:All kinds of plot! Reactionary therapy to affection, love, sex, all kinds of situations.
Favorite Pairings with your character: Hm, Squall/Rinoa, and Cloud/Zack
Game: if they're still open over at dreamwidth.
How long the game has been open: A couple months/a few months.
Activity Level: Medium paced me thinks.
How active are you?: I'll be tagging all day, I hope.
Timezone: Central.
Contact: pm this dreamwidth.
Anything else: I'm signing up somewhere with two characters, it requires a Zack and Squall against my Cloud Strife and Rinoa Heartilly. If playing against Cloud doesn't interest a Zack, then Yuna or Lenne against Zack? Please? Figure out what the game is, it's a sex game. It's part of my reactionary therapy. Someones I love want to show up and love me, but I'm terrified of having any kind of sex. I need help. Please? I'm just kinda wasting away and need help.

I'm notgonnarun away and I'm not a raionesu without you. You know who you two are. Please? I'll be okay. I won't run. I'm not so scared anymore, but I still dissociate. I need help. I won't get up and take baths, because two men are here to help me get better. I need to do this through therapy first with roleplay. I don't want to live in a fantasy anymore. I want reality. Please? I don't want Tidus anymore. ;;
'.
whoever shows up first gets me. http://angelicwings.insanejournal.com is my old Rinoa Journal. I'm converting the other one, it means lioness. I know her pretty well, if you're worried. I have to do Cloud from Scratch but it'll be okay.

Cloud will be trans, a male in a female's body. So I'm doing AU, Rinoa will be a cisfemale. They're my two halves technically? but not really, they're just my dream helpers at the end of the day. The characters I want to play.
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Other characters I need to play later are Yuna and Lenne. (Against males as well) Hm, Axel/Lea with his KH cast. [no sex, just him sticking around with lots of cuddling, and forehead kisses. Axel's kinda everyone's dad in my head. Though possibly against Inezo/Zexion and I think that's it.]



I also need to play Noctis against Prompto. Heavily. I'll explain why later, but my Noct is trans too. Look at his chest, quite possible. Lady Lunfreya is welcome too. And delicate looking but im definitely more big and busty Rinoa Heartilly. I'm fat, is what I'm saying. Should I not play the characters because of that? I went through stuff too, which is why I'm so big. Everytime someone tries to come and love me, I just want to eat and piss myself. UI'm so scared all the time. I was raped when I was little. Someone please help.

Um... also other characters later. But I'll be working on Final Fantasy for now. I need to. It was a staple of my life.and my Zack against aerith and Cloud. and my Cloud against Genesis.

I got Rude for a certain penguinfaery who I miss dearly, and Roxas for a Danica I miss dearly. I got Auron for a Rikku named Pammie Sue, and Serah for a Snow or a Noel, or both, and a Tifa for Zack later on. And a Sora for A kairi or Riku. or both. Ahhh, I can pretty much play any male character against a female who needs it, but I need help too. Okay? I want to live now. I want to be happy too. I can't do this alone.

notgonnarun, I'm not an island kidsoldier, and I've got my fairside and I should be an everlongstar at the end of this, you stole this journal and I am pissed. It was unique and my livejournal username, it was supposed to be my rinoa username. -_- Someone stole it from my damn brain recently. Grrrr. Anyway. Come on! Let's roll.

I was also forced to have an abortion, I have a few different final fantasy plots, even ones based on Dissidia. No I don't want to play all the characters but incase it's needed! yeah.

I might die. If I don't get help. Normal therapy, doesn't work! I tried. When I did light therapy, It fucked me up. Please understand, my mom told me stay away from roleplay or i was kicked out of my house. i had no where to go until now. I'm in a rest home waiting it out. OTL. i think...she knows, I face this and we never talk again. Do you understand? I think she also loves the love of my love and it's creepy. Ahh, yeah.